Thursday, February 7, 2013

Faith not Fear

Happy NEW YEAR! Alright, maybe a little belated, but hey I'm a few days early for the Chinese New Year and I'm pretty sure they've had a calendar longer than us.

I typically was one to dream and write down some mini resolutions when it came to looking forward to the New Year, but this year I tried to keep it down to a motto.  FAITH NOT FEAR.

Man, I really had no idea how much fear kept me from things... I typically thought of myself as a pretty bold and daring individual, yet in a lot of ways little fears kept me back.  My propensity towards anxiousness and worries really picked up a few years ago when my health started tanking (as attested by all those weird blogs about things I could/ could not eat). Then I got PREGNANT!  Which compounded my health worries because my health affected another! And then i HAD A BABY!  Who although healthy, was a little peanut- 4lb 3oz.  So then I WORRIED about getting enough food in her, teaching her how to br3ast feed, and having enough milk supply-- the list goes on.  Gratefully, all those worked themselves out and then I was on to worry about her colic and screaming fits, which subsided and I was on to worrying about her napping and sleeping habits!  Of course all these things are natural concerns of a mother... but at times I really had to battle not letting the fear and anxiety take hold.

It was a fearsome fight.  And I'll be honest,  I doubt my battles with fears are somehow now going to be over.  But I have at least felt that I have come to recognize the battle for what it is.  By calling naming it and recognizing I am powerless without help I can call on others to pray for me.  As much as I try, my methods don't work. I can't rationalize away these fears.  Being the intellectual, I love to read and learn and I want the best advice out there... but I've learned whatever advice I take or follow I have to exercise faith!  There is much advice and wisdom out there, but if I don't have peace from God about it-- I will still be a MESS!

Happy 5 months my New Life I'm so proud of you!  We are sleep training and you are being quite the champ about it.

While I would tell anyone who is struggling with baby sleep habits that there is no magic pill out there for their baby, here are the two books I (and many others) have found extremely helpful.  Specifically the 90 min sleep cycle book changed our world!


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